Ghosted

Available on Apple TV+

It’s easy to sneer at romcoms, given that few other genres are as prone to the dull, paint-by-numbers approach to filmmaking that is so often favoured by big studios. But, as viewers of the wonderful Rye Lane will attest, when they are good, they can be joyous and life-affirming.

Sadly, Ghosted is very much in the former camp. Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick’s story is a lazy rehash of previous genre fare (think True Lies without any of the 90s bombast), while co-stars Ana de Armas (who, on the back of last year’s Blonde, is on a worrying run of duds) and Chris Evans have all the chemistry of a couple that has been thrown together off the back of a hastily conducted market research exercise.

Amazingly, the robotic interactions between de Armas and Evans isn’t the worst thing about Ghosted. Nope, that honour would go to its screenplay, which feels like it was churned out by a malfunctioning piece of AI. Not only do Reese, Wernick and their motley crew of co-writers try and pass off Captain America as a honey farmer, they also ask you to believe that de Armas’ character would fall for him after he a) bombards her with texts after one date and b) takes a picture of her while she’s sleeping.

Yes, this is all kinds of bad – and that’s before I get on to Adrien Brody’s antagonist, who we are told is French but whose only connection to the home of the city of love appears to be that he is about as intimidating as a stale, long-forgotten baguette.  Which, funnily enough, would be another way of describing this mercifully forgettable film.